Hebrews 12:11-13 “All
discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those
who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of
righteousness. 12Therefore, strengthen the hands that are weak
and the knees that are feeble, 13and make straight paths for your feet, so
that the limb which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed.”
There are different ways to process life: throwing pity
parties, (a personal favorite of mine), ignoring the problem…or find the humour
in it. (And yes I just spelled that with a “u” it’s the British way of spelling
it mind you).
Vulgarity. I hear that word and I think of vultures and a
putrid smelling, moldy container of food left in the fridge too long.
Eww like the food I kept in my fridge. I was hoping to eat
it eventually but it went bad. It stunk up my whole dorm room when I opened the
fridge to throw it out. I had to throw open the windows and door to get rid of
the smell. It’s very hard to get rid of smells they cling.
It is 9:41 and I am in/on the Sky Bridge in Western
Washington University’s library. The people around me are sucking up every bit
of sanity they can gather and trying to absorb every last lick of material into
their already information saturated brains. But if we were to be honest, many
of my fellow student’s brains are saturated with more than just information
from classes. Every day we are squeezed of hope and wrung out of any aspiration
or inclination to lift up our eyes. Then we are soaked in despair, and small
ingratiating habits and ideas. They stick us with a thousand poisonous words
and ideas. And everyone is drowning and pulling and grasping anyone around
them. Pulling them down whilst trying to pull themselves up. And if nothing
else at least pulling others down with them so that they won’t be alone in
their pits.
I sound very bitter
don’t I? I make it sound extremely depressing. Like we are all in prison or
being held and tortured against our will. Instead we are
fed thousands of little lies, harmless, naïve, gray, and unstable half-truths
and deceptions wrapped in partial truth. And we are all sick.
Well I was.
It’s really hard. I get hungry and they are continually
offering these little lies wrapped in partial truths.
But today was beautiful. And I’m not stuck. God pulled me
out of the pit.
It feels so good to breath clean air. To know truth, to receive a taste of something pure and good.
I’m pretty wretched. The worst of sinners. And I messed up again today. I’m stuck in a cycle of sin. And keep letting myself getting sucked back in.
But every time God pulls me out and sets me on my feet again. And doesn’t just set me on my feet, but He’s been training me too. He’s been strengthening my feeble arms and weak knees. Showing me how to defend against these attacks. Showing me how to focus on loving and acting out my faith in obedience. Teaching me not to live in fear. I’m so afraid of failing again. Of walking back into this disgusting pit again. But God is so patient. He has rescued me every single time.
Why should I be afraid? Why should I be hopeless? God is my strength and my song.
It feels so good to breath clean air. To know truth, to receive a taste of something pure and good.
I’m pretty wretched. The worst of sinners. And I messed up again today. I’m stuck in a cycle of sin. And keep letting myself getting sucked back in.
But every time God pulls me out and sets me on my feet again. And doesn’t just set me on my feet, but He’s been training me too. He’s been strengthening my feeble arms and weak knees. Showing me how to defend against these attacks. Showing me how to focus on loving and acting out my faith in obedience. Teaching me not to live in fear. I’m so afraid of failing again. Of walking back into this disgusting pit again. But God is so patient. He has rescued me every single time.
Why should I be afraid? Why should I be hopeless? God is my strength and my song.
