Ski Poles and Death

When I hear that someone has died it feels like someone has handed me a pair of skis to carry.
It's awkward, I don't know whether to carry them over my shoulder or in my arms.
They keep slipping out and hitting me in the shins when I carry them in my arms. And when I balance them across my shoulder I end up hitting people with the ends. So I keep trying different ways, but none of them quite works.

Hearing that someone has died is this unmanageable, difficult, and strange load to carry. I don't know whether to leave it lying where I found it, hurl it in the opposite direction or carry it. If I should carry it, then how?

Regardless, if I choose to carry them now or later, I will have to carry this. If not now I'll be forced to come back and take it up later. I don't want that. So I choose to carry it now.